Today, all in the Shala was very quiet. I got a nice spot near Guruji’s picture. When I started, I had to watch out a bit, because one woman was practising flip-flops in front of me, so I backed off a little and gave her some space. Still every time when I heard her landing, I watched her heels in the level of my eyes. And I hit accidently the guy next to me three times today during my practice. I bet, that he wanted to be next to someone else…
I had very strong and deep practice today. I am trying to learn, how to jump through and I am looking for my point of balance. I am reading John Scott’s Ashtanga Yoga book and I think that jump through is very well explained in that book. This might be the first time, when I got the idea, that I don’t actually have to jump through, but ”jump up to the point of balance, and then sit down”. I have a feeling that jump through is more about good technique than strength. So I just have to repeated it one time after another, so that I will find out, what the trick actually is.
I also like the way, how John Scott explains in his book Kurmasana and Supta Kurmasana. He says that: ”The very nature of a tortoise is slow – an indication that this posture is not to be rushed.”. He writes also that: ”In addition, this asana is the ”gateway” pose to Nadi Sodhana, or purification of the nervous system.”. I totally agree with him. Kurmasana and Supta Kurmasana are so heavy for me. I was yesteday so tired before lunch and today I fell a sleep after breakfast. The practice is so intense now, that it really eats my energy. I am getting my energy back during the afternoons, but I can already see, that it isn’t really a piece of cake to get my strenght back. I mean, I can remember the time, when my Primary Serie was actually light. Luckily I don’t have to do this in the middle of busy work days and cold weather. And I really feel that I am getting stronger here.
Sharath wasn’t assisting me today, but he still asked, when I was moving to my finishing poses, how everything went, was I able to close Supta Kurmasana and who assisted me. He is so watching me! I have to keep him confident and build up my strength. I am not doing my practice for my teacher, but when I can show, that my asana is stable, it shows at the same time, that my mind is stronger, too. Sometimes I think that ashtanga is like a school for stubborn people. You have to accept your weaknesses, be quiet, take yourself to your physical and mental limits day after day, face enourmous difficulties, repeat same asanas thousands of times, collapse and start all over again. And finally (if you are smart and patient enough) you might realize, that there is no hurry and you actually learn to listen to yourself.
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