I went to see a doctor on Saturday and he did the normal exams for me, where he is stretching my legs and checking out the mobility. Everything was normal again until he had a look of my scans and I could see based on his facial expression that it was bad. The bulge is really big and it’s pressing the nerves, so the worst scenario is that they have to do an emergency surgery. Of course once again the doctor wanted me to take medicine and do some physiotherapy, but I only take medicine, if I feel really bad and I don’t see a point to start physio here, then go back home and do it again with somebody else. Doctor also talked about bed rest, wearing a support belt all the time etc. but honestly I thought that it was just old-fashioned. But of course I freaked out, when he talked about the worst scenarious and should I stop yoga. But he wasn’t telling me to stop, just said that I shouldn’t bend my back.
I didn’t do led class on Sunday, because I have to be more cautious about my practice and I didn’t sleep well. I am planning to do the led classes later here, but I have to feel full-power to go there. Mysore practice is ok, because I can control the speed and I don’t get so easily carried away. But I watched the led Second and now it’s so full that people are practicing on stage. Teija and Pia were doing Karandavasana on stage and it looks scary, because the spots are so narrow and the wall is close. Maybe next week folks will be practicing in changing rooms…
Sunday’s conference was mind-blowing. My only advise to people, who have heard something negative about Mysore or Sharath is to come here, practice and make your own decision after that. Half of my friends including me were in tears during the conference, because Sharath just spoked so beautifully about this practice. Sharath said for example what’s the use to have a beautiful body, if you don’t have a good heart. He talked about commercial yoga (he asked among other what is hot yoga) and talked also about how people are critizising that he doesn’t teach pranayama or meditation. People nowadays just want instant results. He said that his duty is to teach us, he could be promoting, how many students he has, but that’s not what he is doing. He also sort of pointed out, that some people just don’t get this practice, they come here because of authorization or even call him to get it.
There was also one a little bit unpleasant moment during the conference, when some girl asked about teachers, who are teaching in a different way than Sharath and she mentioned for example Tim Miller and Tim Feldmann (who was actually present in the Shala with his wife Kino MacGregor). I think that the girl was either total beginner or otherwise she had something against those teachers. I haven’t practiced with those teachers, but I know that Tim Felmann’s reputation as a teacher is excellent and also the fact that he was present in the Shala during that time should talk on his behalf. I also have many friends, who have practiced with Tim Miller and I can tell that they have learned a lot from him. It seems to me that part of being teacher is to keep your own strong teaching style (even when some students will never understand it or this practice).
Sharath was also talking about the dilemma of two gurus. Two gurus are going to kill the student. That is so true. It is very confusing to practice with teachers, who don’t know this system and who haven’t studied here or learned this practice from somebody, who has been here. This is not some promotion talk for Sharath (because he doesn’t need that), but more a promotion talk for traditional ashtanga yoga practice. We choose our teachers (and our teachers choose us), so I think that it’s good to have a minute to think about that. How deeply you really connect with your teacher?
I had a word with Sharath after conference about doctor’s consultation and I told him, that I still want to practice, because I said that I have to keep my muscles strong to keep my back together. Sharath said that I can always stop my practice, if it hurts. He also said, that I shouldn’t stress too much. I should just focus on my breathing and relax. He also said something personal, which I don’t want to share here, but which just shows me, how special man he is. Why I love Sharath so much as my teacher is that he is able to come on my level (either literally helping me to do the poses on the floor or on conversational level). This is a huge thing with Indian man and guru, because often in Indian culture guru is something very superior.
Sharath has deserved my respect being so humble. His body is beautiful, his mind is strong, but his heart is sensational. And I am connected to that heart.